Apparently. Ayesha Curry is getting a cooking show and true to form, Black Twitter erupted with memes making fun of her. Ole girl tweeted one thing a few months ago and is now the princess of patriarchy, hated by all. Don’t get me wrong- I get it. Most Black women don’t have access to the “ladyhood” that Ayesha does. But, I mean y’all, she was tweeting about her own experiences. I’m the first person to stand in support of nuance so I understand how they came off as leaving no room for women to exist on the other side of the spectrum. As if dressing modestly is the one way to get a man or should be the key to being respected as a woman in this day and age. We don’t know for sure, but if that is actually how she feels, then it’s a bit of an antiquated view (in my opinion).
However, as a feminist, I will support her right to have it. I think we’ve gotten feminism confused with a lot of things that it isn’t. Which is partially due to the fact that a I don’t believe a clear view or outline of the feminist movement and its goals has been articulated. Equality of the sexes, sure, but what does that mean in a practical sense? What space does that leave for intersectionality, trans-issues, and the needs of the LGB+ community?
Feminism doesn’t mean that women are better than men. It doesn’t mean putting women ahead of men. It shouldn’t be about perpetuating differences among groups of women, which is why intersectionality is so key. And it should not only create space, but actively advocate for the rights, needs, and desires of queer and trans people. Feminism is about tearing down the structures in our society that have for so long privileged one group to the detriment of all the others.
Thing is, if we ever want to live in a society where everyone is not only tolerated, but actually accepted then we’ve got to stop praising one type of person and ragging on another. Take for example Cardi B and Ayesha Curry. Why is it that the timeline praises one and mocks another? Why can’t the experiences of both be valid and important examples of what feminism looks like?
At the end of the day, feminism is all about opening up the world so that more people have a say in what their life looks like. So for me, it isn’t Ayesha or Cardi, this feminist is here for them both. I hope one day you will be too.