In case you missed it, Cardi B. was in rare form on the LHHNY reunion Monday night.
She draggedddddddd Peter to the end of the earth and back. Of course Black Twitter had various perspectives on the subject. You had your hoteps who think that Cardi is a hoe and therefore aren't willing to hear anything that she said. You had people who didn't really have a perspective and you had people, like me, who think Cardi B. is a feminist icon. I'll say that again, Cardi B. is a feminist icon. Feminist Icon akin to mother Maya. Before you get your panties in a bunch and wonder how dare I can compare Cardi B. to Maya Angelou, study mother Maya a bit more in depth and hopefully you'll come to understand better.
Cardi B. is a feminist icon because she is exactly what patriarchy doesn't want us, as women, to be. She's loud. She owns her sexuality. She speaks her mind. She's not afraid to work or receive what she wants. And she doesn't believe in letting any man rule her life. She's about her business and I think is on track to have a fruitful career.
Cardi B. is important because she doesn't prescribe to respectability politics that say women are only worthy of respect if they're virgins or have had enough sexual partners to make them experienced in the bedroom but not a "hoe." She's important because she's willing to do what men have been doing to women for centuries, use them. And while her delivery might not have been the best in the moment, her sentiment is crucial. Relationships should be mutually beneficial. This does not have to come through monetary means, but if you're going to be at my crib all day, eating all my food, and using my water and electricity, it's not crazy for me to think that you as my man should contribute something towards a bill or two. Her point is that Peter clearly doesn't care about Amina or Tara based upon his actions. He continues to embarrass them, put them in less than ideal situations, and is not at all demonstrating what a healthy, loving, relationship looks like for his children.
Peter is a prime example of a man who manipulates and uses women. So naturally, Cardi's actions and her sentiments about sexuality and relationships would bother him. Peter and men like him, do not like women with agency as they threaten their very existence and mode of operating in the world. Peter believes that Cardi does not love herself because Cardi won't be used by men and is willing to claim her sexuality in ways that don't align with respectability politics - making her broken in his eyes. I would argue that his claim couldn't be farther from the truth. Cardi is about her business and demands respect from all who come in contact with her. If that isn't self-love I'm not sure what is.
So, Cardi was right to drag him. I only wish that Amina and Tara would do the same. Love is all good and great but not when it's attached to someone who does not treat you well. In addition, to everyone that wanted to discredit or silence Cardi because she used to be a stripper/"hoe" please, check yourself because your misogyny and adherence to the politics of respectability is showing. Men use sex to get ahead all the time. Why is it a problem when women do it? Cardi, just like any other woman should be afforded respect and protection simply because she is a human being and her actions are not harming anyone - in fact, the sentiments behind them are pretty inspirational.
Love and Hip Hop is problematic in many ways and for many reasons, but I'm thankful to Mona Scott-Young for bringing Cardi B. into my life and TV every Monday night. I'm here for her. Cardi B. for President, or just maybe my best-friend? Please?