Nothing captivates the attention of an audience more, than the juicy, intimate, details of the private love lives of the rich and famous. Regardless of how these celebrities were able to attain their status (talent, privilege, or one-hit-wonders), we as fans are always excited about the aspects of their lives that we can most relate to in our day-to-day. Sure we can’t relate with the paparazzi, the private jets, the countless nights at the club, but there is one shared experience that will transcend bank accounts, awards, and name-recognition: the quest for love.
With such intimate forms of social media these days, artists and other stars can directly and readily communicate with the digital world in a matter of seconds. Whether the platform is Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram, these celebrities can, for better or worse, engage us in their everlasting journey to find ‘the one.’ Like any shared experience there are aspects of it that we feel as though we can truly relate to and by nature of that, it is very natural to make assumptions; which brings me to the situation of my brother Dominic Woods, commonly known as Sage the Gemini.
Via, a now deleted, Instagram post, Dominic took to the popular photo-sharing app to reach out to ex-girlfriend, Jordin Sparks. After reading the extensive open love letter (or plea), my personal reaction was filled with much sympathy, due to the fact that the brother clearly was emotional and heartfelt. But beyond every other emotion I was filled with questions. What went wrong? Is she not responding his calls? Why did he not hit her up directly? Without all of the facts, it was hard for me to truly be ‘rooting’ for him, but I could simply send good vibes his way and pray that their situation is cleared up in a way that allows both parties can attain peace and understanding. Some of the fans of the Sage-Sparks relationship took it upon themselves to reach out to Jordin’s social media profiles to “call that man” and “stop playing.” I personally do not find the excessive trolling to be truly problematic, because I think it’s important to understand that Jordin has already exposed herself to the limelight and that, in part, comes with the territory. What I did find problematic was the negative assumptions that were being drawn from the post.
Without knowing any of the facts, some of us are quick to witness situations such as this and automatically pair these experiences with failed relationships (usually by fault of the man) such as Chris Brown’s (failed) quest to keep the heart of the beloved Karrueche Tran or the heated relationship of Nayvadius Wilburn (aka Future) and Ciara Harris. My good friend who authored the original post is not exempt from to these occasional assumptions, and although not directly implicating Sage as the catalyst of this failed (or simply stalled) quest for for love, the rhetoric of the article ‘Too Little, Too Late’ paints a vivid picture of Jordin Sparks as the victim of this experience.
Yes, “women should be wary of men who say they love them then act in a manner that doesn’t match up to their words,” but men should be wary too. More importantly, we have no basis to even speak on the actions of Sage the Gemini because we don’t know what happened. If the day comes where details behind the breakup reveal that Sage was in fact unfaithful at some point, then I believe that the language behind the ‘Too Little, Too Late’ article would have more legitimacy to stand on. The fans, of both Jordin Sparks and Sage the Gemini, that have taken to their personal social media profiles and blogs to speak their peace on the relationship woes of the two, have every right to advocate for or against their reunion. What can be problematic is jumping to conclusions and negatively assessing a situation based off of previously witnessed or experienced situations.
If every woman were to assume that a failed relationship came at the hands of the man, we would give way to a generation of daughters that are born with trust-issues and generation of sons that may be afraid to speak their heart. We need to support love and the only way we can do that is by making sure that we have all of the necessary facts to properly assess a situation before attempting to give an educated opinion or making an enlightened decision.
Give him the benefit of love.
-The Ghost’s Perspective