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liabilities & assets: how (not) to love a girl who travels.

Travel

liabilities & assets: how (not) to love a girl who travels.

Gabrielle Hickmon

I have always worried that my sense of adventure would be a liability and not an asset. "Oh she's fun." "You're so spontaneous." "She's down for whatever." "My girl been to 5 continents." "Damn, you're going where?" "Wow, you're gonna be gone a month?" "I feel like I never see you."

 Liability. Not asset.

See, it's cool to love a girl who travels until you realize she might not ever stop looking for flights. It's cool to love a girl who travels until her adventures are taking her everywhere except to you. It's cool to love a girl who travels until picking her up from the airport becomes more like a chore than something to get excited about.

Liability. Not asset. 

My childhood was filled with trips so wandering has been a part of my life, my energy, my aesthetic for as long as I can remember. Wandering. A wanderer is who I am.

Only I don't wander aimlessly and everywhere I go has a purpose. Each trip carefully designed to bring me closer to myself, the world, love, God - you.

As a kid it was cool. Teen, unique. In college it was awe-inspiring. As a young adult, people still ask me, where are you going next? And it used to be that I'd proudly proclaim my next city or country, only now I've realized that at a certain point, people expect the wandering to stop, the restlessness to fade away, and for settling down in one place/city/space to become a priority.

I know he did. They do. 

Want you to be around. Able to have tabs kept on. To occupy a space that "makes sense" which more often than not just means a mold fashioned for you that doesn't fit. Because now, the very thing they fell in love with, your free spirit and wild heart, has been fashioned into a noose they've hung around your neck that only gets tighter and tighter with each new destination and pretense of being happy for you about it.

That's not how you love a girl who travels.